Baking Cookies with the Nordics
by Animedorito5
Summary: Basically, Denmark is spending the week at Norway's house while his is being fixed up or something and they go on an adventure to find some beer, avoid some moose, and…..bake cookies! Warning: Denmark is a lot like the Denmark in SatW so he may be a little OOC at times...(my first fanfic, so please try not to hate too much)
1. Important Author's Note

Hey y'all, this is my first fanfiction….well ever. I would love any advice and criticism, but please not too much hate.

So here are a couple of pretty important notes that I would appreciate if you took the time to read:

If you bothered to read the summary (don't worry if you didn't, I sometimes do it too….shameful I know) this is a story focused on the Nordics (mainly Norway and Denmark) having fun with beer, cookies, and avoiding moose.

And if you haven't watched all the episodes (also like me….wow I'm a failure as an otaku) the Nordics all have very brotherly relationships, except Sweden and Finland (SuFin all the way!), though Norway and Iceland are the only ones officially related (as shown in World Series episode 49).

I also apologize for any wrong information and bad grammar/ spelling mistakes. As I somewhat stated before, I have not watched all the episodes. Also, computers can be stupid sometimes and don't realize you accidentally put a wrong word because the word you put IS in fact a real word just not the one you wanted.

And lastly, I apologize in advance if I don't update on a regular basis. I take part in school sports (not that I have a life beyond that), and so don't have much time in my life after you add other responsibilities into that equation (aka a butt load of homework).


	2. Chapter 1: Norway's Coffee

Chapter 1: Norway's Coffee

"Norge!" Denmark yelled across the house."I'm sooooooooo bored!"

When the country in question did not reply, Denmark started panicking and running around, looking for his brother. Unfortunately, Denmark soon got lost and ended up in the kitchen. _Hmmm._ Denmark wondered. _I wonder if Norway got rid of the case of beer that I stashed here last week._ He opened the fridge and was greeted with various types of coffee and creamer. Mentally facepalming at Norway's obsession with coffee, Denmark rummaged around the back of the fridge.

"What the hell do you think you are doing?" a cold voice echoed from behind him.

Denmark grabbed one of the bags of coffee from the fridge and spun around, throwing the bag at the person who surprised him. In retrospect, that may not have been the best idea. He was greeted by an extremely pissed off Norway, covered in coffee. In an instant, Denmark found himself being strangled by his tie.

"GHA!" Denmark choked."What was that for?!" He complained to his brother.

"You freaking spilled my coffee!" Norway explained, his usually expressionless face sporting a disappointed scowl.

"I was just looking for the beer I stashed here last week! I honestly didn't mean to spill your stupid coffee!" Denmark tried to explain. Norway look like he was about to say something, probably about how Denmark called coffee stupid, but decided better of it and kept quiet.

"What are you doing in my kitchen anyway? I thought I told you to stay in the living room." Norway asked as he began to clean up the coffee. Denmark rubbed the back of his neck.

"Well, I got bored." He stated, simply. Norway sighed.

"That's what the television was for."

Denmark frowned. "When you left, I threw the remote around and kind of lost it. And the channel got stuck on some stupid history thing about Puffins going extinct. So I thought, 'Why not get a beer. I like beer.'"

Norway turned around. "First of all, let's get this straight." He explained carefully."Puffins are not going extinct. They are only endangered due to lack of food, which was caused by global warming."

Denmark cut in before Norway could continue, "LIES! ALL LIES! They are too, going extinct!" Norway tried to say something again, but Denmark cut him off again. "LIAR, LIAR, PANTS ON FIRE!"

"You are a brat." Norway said, regaining his expressionless attitude.

Denmark pouted. "So what happened to my beer?"

Norway thought for a second before answering. "I gave it to Iceland. It was taking up room in my fridge."

Denmark was aghast. "But…my beer..." He trailed off as he started sniffling. Norway sighed in exasperation. He knew he would regret this, but it was the only way to appease Denmark.

"If it will make you feel better, we can go visit Iceland and get your beer back." Denmark's eyes instantly lit up.

"Yes! Can we? Please, please, please! Oh! I know, I'll get my best axe! I'll be right back!" he spurted out as he dashed away to his temporary bedroom. Norway shook his head at his brother's childishness as he walked out of the kitchen, following Denmark; knowing that his idiot brother would get lost again.


	3. Chapter 2: Breaking in Like a Boss

Chapter 2: Breaking In Like A Boss

"So," Denmark started as we walked up to Iceland's house. "This is Ice's house? It looks...normal." Norway shook his head.

"It's a house. What did you expect? Iceland doesn't live in a volcano or something." Denmark's eyes sparkled at the idea. "No, it's physically impossible to live inside a volcano…well an active one anyway. A dormant volcano would most likely not pose any direct… Just never mind." Norway gave up on making a case, so that Denmark wouldn't try to go live in a volcano.

"Well," Norway started," Let's get this over with. Ring the doorbell." Denmark dramatically pushed the doorbell in slow-motion, emphasizing the action with sound effects. "You are just like a little kid," Norway commented as they heard the bell echo throughout the house.

After a couple of minutes, Iceland still hadn't answered. "Maybe he went out to…you know…buy more beer or something?" Denmark attempted to conjure up an excuse for the young, absent Nordic.

Norway shook his head. "He isn't an alcoholic jerk like you." Then, suddenly, Norway realized his dilemma. If his younger brother wasn't home, then Denmark wouldn't get his beer. Then the Dane would be a pain in the butt for the rest of his stay. Holding down the panic, Norway calmly suggested they look for a spare key.

Their search resulted in nothing more than a few scrapes and bruises from the fairly high roof and few potted plants. Norway's calm and cool exterior almost betrayed the dread he was feeling inside. He was starring inside the window to the Iceland's living room when the idea struck him. "Denmark! Come over here."

The Dane made his way over and peered inside the window. "I don't see anything Norge," Denmark sighed sadly. "I really wanted my beer," he pouted.

"Hey, Denmark," Norway suddenly said. Denmark muttered under his breath and started walking away. Norway continued,"Is that a moose?" The Dane's ears perked and a look of panic crossed his face.

"Where?!"

Norway pointed in a random direction. "Over there." Denmark proceeded to rush back up Iceland's driveway and jump through the living room window, narrowly avoiding knocking Norway over. Norway rushed to the windowsill to see if his brother was ok. Instead, he was greeted with a passed out Denmark lying in a pile of glass relatively unscathed.


	4. Chapter 3: MrPuffin's Cookbook

**Ah yes, totally forgot to do this. I'm supposed to say something along the lines of 'I do not own any of the characters, just the story itself, blah blah blah'. I hope you won't go all kung-fu on me for not saying it previous chapter. Anyways, I guess there isn't anything else to say, but 'Enjoy'!**

Chapter 3: Puffin's Cookbook

After cleaning up the mess they made in the living room, the two Nordics ventured to the kitchen to raid Iceland's fridge. Denmark threw the door of the fridge wide open before sorting through the mess of haphazardly-stacked ingredients, looking for his beer. Norway observed the mess of dirty dishes and empty packaging strewn about the kitchen. Denmark exclaimed in joy when he finally found his beer.

"Really?" Norway asked, as Denmark fished the rest of the case of beer out of fridge. Denmark shrugged as he took another swig from the bottle.

Looking around for the first time, Denmark noted the mess. "Is it just me," he began. "Or does it look like Iceland was trying to cook something?"

Disregarding the temptation to say 'Yes, It is just you'; Norway took another good look at the kitchen. "I guess so," he admitted.

"Hey, Norge." Denmark called, standing in front of the wooden table that served as a storage space for unused spices and such similar things. The Dane had picked up a relatively normal looking scrapbook like thing, labeled ' 's Cookbook'.

"What the hell?" Denmark muttered as he leafed through the pages. "What kind of cookbook is this? I've never heard of half these things."

Norway sighed. "That may be for two reasons. One, its 's cookbook; meaning most of this is what a puffin would eat." The Dane's eyebrows creased as he came to the same conclusion. Norway continued, "And second, he made all the food names' fish puns." At this Denmark just looked plain confused. "Never mind."

Denmark continued to leaf through the book, until he found a recipe he understood. "Norge." Denmark placed the cookbook on the table. "Let's make this." He pointed to a Chocolate Chip Fish Cookie recipe.

Norway read the ingredients. "I think I see all the ingredients around here." The Dane hopped in excitement. "But, Denmark?"

"Yes?"

"Do we really need to add the fish?" Denmark's eyebrows furrowed in confusion.

"The what?"

Norway facepalmed. "Idiot! It says Chocolate Chip Fish Cookies! FISH!" He emphasized the word fish, trying to get the fact across the Dane's thick skull. After giving him the 'No duh' face, Denmark ran over to the pantry.

"What do we need?"

Norway reviewed the ingredients carefully, taking note of when he would certain items and where he could most likely find them. "Um, first off we need the sugars. The recipe says we need three-fourths…"

Denmark didn't let him finish. "WHAT? There's more than one type of sugar. I mean it's sugar. How can it be anything other than just plain sugar?"

Norway sighed yet again. "Type wise, there are a lot of kinds of sugar. For this recipe we need regular and brown sugar…"

The two Nordic countries managed to mostly follow the recipe and ended up with decent looking cookie batter. Yes, they did in fact leave the fish out, though Denmark almost added a banana on accident (God knows how).


	5. Chapter 4: Suprises

(Me talking to myself) Haha, silly person! You don't own hetalia characters. I know but I wish I did *breaks out crying*. There, there me; lots of fangirls out there also wish they could...for various reasons. AHHHHHHHHH, me, get the mind bleach!

Chapter 4: Surprises

*several batches of cookies later*

"Finally." Norway collapsed in the kitchen chair, exhausted. He glanced sadly at the single batch of cookies that had come out looking edible. Denmark strode in proudly, having taken off to have a look around Ice's house after the 5th batch of cookies had somehow ended up down Norway's shirt.

"Are the cookies done Norge? I found this odd cookie jar to put them in." So that's why the Dane had an air of smugness surrounding him. He must be feeling quite proud of himself.

"Don't bother." Norway said."Only one batch came out edible." Denmark started to complain about the cookies, or rather the lack of, but Norway exploded before he could really say anything."THERE WOULD BE MORE COOKIES IF SOME IDIOT HADN'T PUT THE OVEN TEMPERATURE WAY TOO HIGH, AND THEN ISISTED THAT WE NEEDED COOL THE COOKIES OFF BY BLOWING ON THEM AND ACCIDENTLY SNEEZED!"

As Norway was choking Denmark with his tie and Denmark was apologizing as best he could, the doorbell rang. Denmark, being the idiot he was, ran to the living room and dove behind the couch.

"What are you doing?" Norway questioned the hiding Dane.

"SHHHHH!" Denmark peeked over the couch. "Iceland's home!" Norway sighed at his stupidity and child-like behavior.

"Ice wouldn't ring his own doorbell, would he?" Norway reasoned, trying to put his friend's mind to rest as he went to answer the door.

Denmark's muffled voice came from behind the couch,"It's all a conspiracy dude!"

Norway shook his head in annoyance. Why he put up with his messed up family, he would never quite understand. "Just go back to the kitchen and do something about the cookies, will you?" The Dane scurried off just as Norway reached the door. Norway attempted to dust off some flour from his usually spotless shirt, but quickly gave up.

Opening the door, he was greeted with an unusual sight. Well not unusual generally speaking, but unusual for the current time and place. Standing on the porch of his little brother's house, Norway was greeted by a stoic Sweden and extremely excited Finland dressed in his Santa Clause outfit.

"MERRY CHRISTMAS!" Finland shouted. Norway, confused, stood rooted in the doorway, unable to make sense of the picture in front of him. Finland continued,"We brought cookies! Actually we stopped by both yours and Denmark's houses first, but since you weren't there we figured you here!" Finland was practically bubbling with excitement, while Sweden kept the same expressionless face he usually had.

"Um, you do know that Christmas isn't for another few weeks, right?" Norway asked as Finland and Sweden invited themselves inside. Finland just nodded and Sweden muttered something along the lines of practice. "And why are you here Sweden? I mean, I can understand Finland showing up randomly, but you were never a social person."

The Swede held up a glass that Norway hadn't noticed before. "Milk," he said, simply. Norway shook his head and made his way to the kitchen, the other two Nordics following behind. Being the first to arrive, Norway was greeted with odd sight.

Denmark was chewing away happily on a cookie while cradling a weird jar. Noticing the new arrivals, he held up the jar. "Hey! Look at the cool cookie jar I found! Its mine now." The Dane smiled in happiness.

Sweden walked over and examined the jar in Denmark's hands. "That looks like an urn."

It suddenly dawned on Norway. "Denmark you imbecile! That's Vinland's urn!"


	6. Chapter 5: Vinland's Cookies

I do not, unfortunately, own Hetalia or its characters….or maybe that's a good thing, since I'm not actually sure what the responsibility of such an honor entitles….so yeah. Thanks for sticking with me this far!

Chapter 5: Vinland's Cookies

"What, NO! This is my cookie jar!" Denmark whined like a little kid. "It's mine and not that Vinland person's!"

It took all of Norway's self control to keep from strangling the Dane to death for real. "Denmark?" Norway asked, after taking a few deep, calming breaths. "Do you even know WHAT an urn is?"

"It's a… um… a special cookie jar, right?" Norway rubbed his temples as he felt the oncoming migraine. He couldn't understand how this idiot had stayed alive so long being the, well, idiot he was.

"An urn," Sweden started. "…is a large, decorated vase used for holding the ashes of cremated loved ones. Well, I suppose they don't necessarily need to be a loved one, per say…" He trailed off as he noticed Denmark still looking confused. Sweden sighed. He had never really liked Denmark, but seeing as how Norway always puts up with him, Sweden felt as Norway should have a break from Denmark. "Well, if my moose died, I would take him to be cremated. His body would be burned and the ashes would be put in an urn." He tried to explain.

Almost instantly, Denmark's confused expression turned to one of panic. He thought that there were moose ashes in his cookie jar. Luckily, Norway calmed him down before he actually threw the urn out of the kitchen window.

"So what are we going to do?" Finland asked no one in particular. Norway and Sweden exchanged a look, knowing this would be a difficult situation. Denmark slowly raised his hand before anyone could awnser.

"Yes Denmark?"

"So there is a person in here?" he asked hesitantly, raising the urn. The other three Nordics exchanged glances.

Norway answered," Well yes. The ashes of a person to be exact." Denmark paused, still trying to get around the fact that a person could fit into the urn, ignoring Norway's last statement.

"So, Vinland stole my cookies." Denmark finally concluded. The other Nordics facepalmed. How the hell did the idiot come up with things like this! And Finland just had to go and make it so much better.

"Well in technical terms, you GAVE Vinland your cookies." Denmark's eyes started to water. Norway, Finland, and Sweden huddled up for a quick family meeting.

"What are we going to do? I doubt we could reason with him right now." Norway began the conversation in a hushed tone.

"I doubt we could reason with him at any time." Sweden remarked, emphasizing his hate for the Dane's stupidity.

Norway rolled his eyes. "Our first objective should be to get the urn away from Denmark. Once we have the urn, we can take our time figuring out everything else." Sweden and Finland nodded as Norway started explaining his plan and how they were going to execute it.


End file.
